Talking in Bed

Talking in Bed

 

 Talking in bed ought to be easiest,

Lying together there goes back so far,

An emblem of two people being honest.

 

Yet more and more time passes silently.

 Outside, the wind's incomplete unrest

Builds and disperses clouds in the sky,

 

And dark towns heap up on the horizon.

None of this cares for us. Nothing shows why

 At this unique distance from isolation

 

 It becomes still more difficult to find

 Words at once true and kind,

 Or not untrue and not unkind.

 

 

Theme: Relationships

 

• The poem concerns a failing relationship between two people who find it difficult to communicate with one another.
• The title "Talking in Bed" suggests a familiar and intimate long-term relationship, whereby a couple are less passionate but close emotionally and comfortable with one another.
• The poem begins with the assertion that "talking in bed ought to be easiest" but the statement is weakened by the modal verb "ought"/should, thus implying that it isn't easy at all.
• The word "lying" is ambiguous as it could have two different meanings (a pun)-sleeping/lying in bed or telling lies over a period of time to a partner. The fact that this "goes back so far" would appear to mean that the silence in bed is a regular and common occurrence.
• As "more and more time passes silently" (alliteration for emphasis), the situation becomes more awkward and tense and "words are difficult to find". The couple have to think hard about conversation topics and cannot even think of something neutral to say ("not untrue and not unkind"). They cannot be "honest" with one another.
• "The wind's incomplete unrest" gives a sense of human stagnation in comparison to nature because as nature moves on, the two people in bed are still stuck at a loss for words-proximity but loneliness-the couple are isolated together. It also reminds the reader of complete and painful silence or awkward small talk concerning the weather.
• Aspects of the modern world do appear in the form of "dark towns", however, "none of this cares for us"- the couple are completely on their own, separated by silence, and no longer even interested in the relationship themselves. A "dark" end may be "on the horizon" for the two people. Larkin could be implying that the modern world has not taught people the value of human communication and that modern life does not bring satisfactory fulfilment to human lives.
• The sense of broken communication and isolation is shown through the poem's structure with a rhyming scheme of ABA, CAC, DCD,EEE to show the absence of continuity and the broken discourse of the couple- augments the hesitancy and uncertainty of the poem.
• As a whole, the poem seems to be ironic in that the word "talking" appears in the title yet no dialogue is present in the poem and the poem focuses around the inability to talk in bed.
• Overall, the poem offers a bleak outlook on modern relationships by suggesting that relationships inevitably come to an end as people run out of things to say and white lies to offer. Larkin clearly believed that love didn't last and was simply a disappointment-apt for a misanthropist.
• Academic links: http://www.philiplarkin.com/talking-in-bed/: